frannyan: (Posessed Aussa)
frannyan ([personal profile] frannyan) wrote2011-05-06 06:06 pm

(no subject)

Dear landlord:

Kindly do not tell me we owe you money when we, in fact. Do not.

- Signed.
Your soon to be former tenant

Ooooh I will be glad to be done with this passive aggressive bullshit. I should NOT have to quote the lease to remind this asshole we paid first and last utilities when we moved in. Utilities that have gone down since they were finally shared like he said they would be from the start. Thus, as he's telling us we owe him, he actually owes us.

And he wants us to: "Please straighten up and clean (especially the kitchen)."

Haha no. We are packing. There are boxes everywhere. Deal with it. And don't give me a sob story about your poor health and say "I know you haven't been feeling well, and that's probably not helping your disposition." when I quote the lease at you, Jim. You are a landlord. If your health is interfering with your ability to READ ENGLISH THAT YOU WROTE, maybe you need to get a new job that doesn't require you to be a functional human being. Don't say I'm being cranky for stating facts.

We stopped being "friends" when you came into our apartment when we weren't home, looked through our things and took something. Ya know. A clear violation of the law. And then got upset when we told you to TELL US NEXT TIME. Legally? We can sue your ass for pain and suffering. You aught to be thanking US for just telling you to give us notice next time, not bitching us out. Just like you should be being nice to us since we haven't told the satellite company about the scam you have going with their installer. Considering you asked us to LIE for you with your insurance fraud, you're damned lucky more ways than I can count. You are a shady lying bastard and I hope you get shitty tenants every time you rent because it's all you deserve. A landlord does not threaten or whine or break the law. He takes care of the damned property, fixes shit when it breaks and doesn't bitch about how much money it costs him and how he doesn't have money to fix anything.

And you better believe we're going to be here when he shows the apartment tomorrow. Last time he came in when we weren't here, a bottle of wine went missing and our stuff was moved. Like hell we're gonna give him the opportunity to do it again.

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